And there we were. I had been asked to help organize the speakers and the program, down at the American Legion cemetery, just outside of town, but we couldn’t get a military honor guard because I wasn’t asked until about two weeks before the event, and all the honor guards are apparently booked for this date every year, a long time in advance. But I’m nothing, if I’m not resourceful. We have this local militia with a bunch of veterans in it, and they were excited. Even found four guys with old uniforms that still fit (if a little tight). So I set it up.

A retired LTC (who just happens to be running for Congress next year – good photo op for him). We got a small replica of the Liberty Bell to ring. Got a minister to come, who was also a veteran, so he was cool. And this one lady made us a very special offer – she has a business where she does what they call a “White Dove Release” at weddings, and she thought it would be very touching (not to mention good for business to get mentioned in the local newspaper) to release a dozen white doves. Wow, I was really touched at that. I could see the symbolism, as these doves could represent, you know, angels or something.

Anyway, it went perfect, and I’d forgotten about the doves. She let them out just AFTER the Honor Guard fired their volley. Good thing too, because I hadn’t thought about it, but those guys were actually using shotguns, because they’re all country boys, and didn’t have a clue where to buy blanks. Bird shot. I’m cool with it. We were out of town, at a country cemetery. No danger to anyone.

Imagine, to everyone’s horror, as this red-tailed hawk came swooping down from out of the blue, literally, and hit the last dove coming out of the basket. Everyone was frozen in horror as they tumbled to the ground, then it started off with its dinner in its talons. Well, everyone except Billy Bob, who is very proud of his semiautomatic Remington 1100, and is a fine shot. He wins turkey shoots every year at the Knights of Columbus events in October and November. Anyway, it was just pure instinct with him – he couldn’t resist that slow moving target of a hawk that had ruined the event, and he blew both the hawk AND the dove into a large blizzard of brown and white feathers. He was standing there looking pleased as punch, like he was waiting to be decorated as Expert Marksman one last time, while the lady with the doves, and everyone else stood in shock and awe.

Well, it WAS in the local papers, I can tell you. Photographer got some magnificent photos. Anyway, next year I think I’m going to have a little more free time, because I don’t think they’ll be asking me to arrange that program any more. I think me an Billy Bob will go bass fishing instead.

© Daniel D. New, Permission to copy, with credits, is hereby granted.-